Tina Belcher's Diary (maskormenace flavor)

[continuousgroaning]

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December 15th, 2017

[continuousgroaning]

[[OOC Reference: this log]]

Dear diary,

After talking to a few people I feel a bit less like a fool but now I'm just left with a lot of questions, a lot of things I need to ask people who aren't here. I can't believe I didn't notice how things were between me and Jimmy Jr., but I'm even more upset that nobody else in my life seemed to notice or thought it would be good to tell me. Louise especially is never shy about speaking up when she thinks I'm being an idiot or when someone else is treating me badly, so... what happened here? I don't think they enjoyed watching me throw myself at a guy who was so hot and cold, so is it just one of those things we were oblivious about, like the fact that we lived for years and years and never noticed that no time seemed to pass?

It's also hard because I've had to take a look at myself and my own actions. I kept pushing Jimmy Jr. sometimes when he wasn't feeling it. I kept chasing after him because of the cute butt and because I wanted him to be my boyfriend. I held onto the good times and kept hoping we'd hit a patch of on-again and it would last. Because the on-again times were so nice. Who else has ever had a midair kiss on a trampoline in front of their classmates? I didn't notice or didn't care when he wasn't feeling it. Maybe that's why he would forget we were a thing and not show up to dates, and I was just too stupid to realize it.

I guess we're both to blame in some ways.

We are just 13, after all.

There's going to be a Candlemas party at Lucretia's house soon, I'm going to Archie and Maxie's place for their party, and Poe's invited me to one on Christmas Eve.

Maybe I will just let John from the coffee shop ask me out and take him to meet my friends. It couldn't hurt, and I'll try better not to screw up this time. And I'll go and buy a new dress and put on some makeup and be beautiful for the parties.